It all started a few weeks back when my wife and I were cruising the aisles of one of our favorite disc shops and I was authorized by my better half to buy a disc (not that I needed any authorization, but when you're married, authorizations make for smooth sailing) and nothing I looked at was ringing my bell... when I spied the new DIO compilation STAND UP AND SHOUT and saw that it was a pretty comprehensive look at Ronnie's entire career: the thought of hearing "HOOCHIE KOOCHIE LADY" from the ELF days in all its digitally remastered glory was a trip down memory lane I couldn't say no to. When I got home and sent the wife and baby on a walk (I forgot to check out my wife's tolerance for loud 'n' proud "rawk" music before I said "I do," so if I wanted to enjoy HKL, the walk was the smartest move) and cranked up Disc 1, I recalled just how much fun this style was: sheets of volume that would make a frog sterile, funny lyrics (OK, maybe stupid ones, too) about girls and demons and devils and girls again, and of course, HUGE GUITAR NOISE! It took me back to 1973 and a small bar in Oswego, New York and Ronnie James singing with a power that would take him all the way to the Ozzy-vacated slot in Black Sabbath for cryin'out loud! That is, for me, one of the real powers of music: the ability to melt away time and space and return you to a good time in the blink of an eye...

Well, sir, that did it. I started pulling out some of the best stuff from that golden era: Early 70's heroes like Mountain, Uriah Heep, Trapeze, and the mighty Bloodrock. "Wait a minute, buster! Those bands are not my heroes!" you say. Well, that's OK by me. The whole point of this is not to convince you to run out and buy Demons and Wizards tomorrow but to insert your own bands in the slots and have some FUN with this. That may be the most annoying trait of the hardcore fans of the heavy/metal/hard/whatever genre: they're just too damn SERIOUS!!! Music has enough boobs who act like every chord and word they utter/play is going to change the world and you had better be listening and buying and swallowing it without gagging. If you want serious, go plop down your change on Ani DiFranco or Dashboard Confessional or Natalie Merchant or (insert your selection here)...

I would be remiss if I didn't plug some of my fave ravers here:

1. Trapeze, "Touch My Life" 1971---this has it all: a great repeating riff, banshee vocals, and in and out in just over four minutes.

2. Mahogany Rush, "Strange Universe" 1974---Yeah, the Hendrix fixation got a tad old after awhile, but this is dope! Killer drums, atmospheric guitar/vocal combo, and a double time break that burns!

3. Mountain, "Never In My Life" 1970---Jimi Hendrix stopped his session to go next door and check out Leslie West tearing through this one. Great groove, a barking-dog vocal, and thunderous skin-pounding make this slab o' wax unforgettable.

4. James Gang, "Bluebird" 1969---Joe Walsh tackles Buffalo Springfield and turns a soft-rocker into a guitar-grinding epic: Joe may be one of the most underrated players since most people only associate him with his tenure in the Eagles.

So what if your favorite band didn't get going till '80? Remember, this is my own private Idaho, so weigh in with yours! But please, don't tell me that you whipped out your Cyndi Lauper and Cat friggin' Stevens and started remembering how you got to 2nd base at that sorority bash sophomore year. Keep that tragic tale locked away with the rest of your family skeletons, or next time I'll be forced to tell how I did a year in a Bee Gees cover band... and dug it!!!!!!!

Later,

G2 the G

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