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I'm on the list #6
A gazpacho of musical facts, rumors, rants and minutiae with a pinch of humor, best served cold.
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by Gary "G2 the G" Griffin

Installment Index


Grammies, Scammies and Janet

ELLO READERS! That is, if I still have any... Let's talk about the Grammy awards coming up on Sunday, February 8th. But not too much, 'cause writing good words about this flatulent exercise in music industry self-congratulation is wasting all of our time together...

The Grammys (or as it is often referred to, The Scammies) have always managed to GET IT WRONG!!!! Examples? Ok, 2 words: MILLI VANILLI!!!! Or the famous Jethro Tull Best Metal award (or was it hard rock? Either one suggests that no one ever actually listened to the Tull song) of a few years back. My personal dislike began the year that "Bridge Over Troubled Water" beat out "Hey Jude" for Record of the Year. Even Elvis Presley only received one in the Gospel category. Friggin' Elvis, for cryin' out loud!!!

The only saving grace about the Grammys is that when you get a boatload of them, it kinda finishes off your career. Remember Tracy Chapman? Not many people do after her Best New Artist nod, either. The jury is still out on Alicia Keys, but her second CD hasn't been exactly flying off the shelves. Hopefully, this year's trophy will make either 50 Cent or Evanescence go away, as they are both up for the dreaded New Artist statue. And don't blink or go to the bathroom or you'll miss 95% of the award winners. It used to be a few years ago, if your award wasn't one of the televised major ones, you might at least get a still photo shot and an announcer saying "awarded earlier in the evening". Now these are printed in small type and flashed on the screen as they tell you of the upcoming performance of Kenny G or Justin Timberlake. I'm sure we're not too far off from "All other winners may be seen at our website ohyeah,here'stheotherwinnersifanybodycares.com"...

In other news, I have been wrestling with whether or not I should weigh in on the SuperBore "controversy" like everybody else within reach of a computer keyboard has/will. So here goes...

Are you kidding? Wait a minute, let me rephrase that: ARE YOU KIDDING!!!!! My theory is that the NFL is actually behind the whole thing. That's right, they did it on purpose. How else is anybody gonna remember the most faceless game in a long line of boring, overhyped games? The halftime show (generally a music event of some kind) has always been more of an attraction than the game itself; mainly though, because you want to tune in and see IF IT'S GONNA SUCK AS BAD AS LAST YEAR'S!!!! The list of crappy halftime "spectaculars" is so long I don't have the time or space to run them down. You have your own personal "favorite," I'm sure. It's too bad that a spent musical performer like Janet J. will now probably have a comeback because of this stunt.

Well, I'm gonna sign off here and promise that in '04 I will get more columns done. What with South by Southwest coming up, the usual barrage of new releases and the latest record company firings/hirings/mergers soap opera, there's plenty of fodder for my brand of rant. Till next time...

P.S. Go and get the new reissue of David Bowie's overlooked Black Tie/White Noise. A superb package and proof of his greatness yet again!!!!

G2 the G


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About the writer
Gary "G2 the G" Griffin has over thirty years of experience in slacking as a musician. He is proficient on numerous instruments, but not including the pan flute. An avid record collector and repository of useless and obscure musical facts, his current focus is teaching his one-year-old son, Taylor (yes, named after the guitar), to play an open-tuned, bottle-necked guitar. Mr. Griffin, his lovely wife/muse, Alexandra, and Taylor currently reside in Alexandria, Virginia. He can be reached at brkicgary@msn.com